must get out

ugh. after 1 year, 3 months, and 6 days at my current job, I’ve suddenly come to realize that I completely and thoroughly despise 60% of what I’m supposed to do. The final straw came when I heard on good (office scuttlebutt) authority that our goals are going to be raised, and much of what we do for existing customers will no longer count toward meeting those goals. The reason? The powers that be say that the company is losing $$ because too many people are “comping” (e.g., performing well above minimum standards and thus getting financial compensation above basic salaries). MY WHOLE GOAL IN THIS JOB IS TO HELP PEOPLE!!! And now that will no longer “COUNT”??? In fact, if that’s mostly what I do, I’ll more than likely be fired for not “meeting minimum standards”? I’ve finally and profoundly realized that my company, in its basic policies governing lowly retail workers like myself, does NOT care about taking care of the customer. It simply cares about making money. If it were not profitable to be ethical, my company would not be ethical. ::sigh:: I’m SO in the wrong line of work! I have no problem staying with my company–I just need to be in a VERY different department.

Still, I must say…I’m incredibly grateful to have employment, and I am very grateful for this job. I consider myself VERY fortunate to be at this company with the benefits and perks that it offers. I’m just sad that my idea of what doing a good job is comprised of doesn’t jive with the idea my superiors have of the same concept. It just makes me very sad and lowers my morale. Now, if I were a good little retail worker, I’d be fired up by what they tell me and want to go out and work harder…for whatever current carrot, er, prize that’s being offered. I don’t mind selling. In fact, when I get people in front of me–even people who don’t really want what I have to offer–if they can benefit from it and are relatively reasonable and willing to converse, I have a darn good pack rate (e.g., I’m really good at selling LOTS of products to the customers I work with). I just hate the pressure to sell to people who don’t need, don’t want, can’t afford what I have to offer. It’s stupid–I’m here to HELP people have simpler, better lives, not to badger, manipulate, or trick them into getting something they don’t need or won’t benefit from. That’s just not in me.

If anyone can simply pray that I will be a gracious, godly witness and that God will help me to find something better suited to my talents and temperament and to be fearless, strong, self-motivated, creative, and “outside-of-the-box-thinking”, I’d be forever grateful.

much love.

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